Being outside drives my adrenaline through the roof

Its aweful. I get overwhelmed, the site of the vehicles, passing by so quickly, and the sounds almost deafening. Being pregnant, I seem to get motion sick standing still. Can you imagine what its for my eyes trying to keep up with constant motion of busy streets and highways. They still treat me like I am playing. They are always playing, they never stop. Ive been exposed to the elements for less than 3 hours and I am already increadibly angry. No where to go of my own and it seems like the world is against me. Who could blame the world when they've been lied to so severely, they really think that they are in the right for persecuting me. They dont know that they have been duped. Im up against a wall of cover ups that seems like the great wall.
I have the aspergers syndrome that Im not allowed to have and I cant handle the constant sabotage. I hate my life some days. They keep this girl so stressed out that I can barely spend decent quality time practicing my baby ritual. I cant keep up with the lies. The distances that the lies reach are that of a camel spewing. Its aweful. It makes this girl so angry instead of being able to concentrate on anything positive. I spend all this time being attacked.
I really just dont like being outside anymore. I hate it. The only time I seem to be alright out there is when I am exercising. Otherwise I would prefer to stay inside and concentrate on building a business or healing from all the horrible things that have happened.
Now I hear that because I freaked out that the baby's father left. Great. I didn't know that he was here. Im so tired of looking like a fool because I am thrust out into the great outdoors and I just cant handle the stress of no transportation and vehicles wizzing by. Now I have to go find him, which if I had transportation would be fine. With no transportation that feels like a feat beyond my ability. What if I get all the way back up north and he's not there and I made the trip for nothing. Now I am surrounded by a bunch of people that think that they know me.
I think that the baby's father is under the impression that I am not having the baby or something. They just offered me water alone, which lately will make me gag. That definitely isn't enought to get the baby nourished. It isn't up to any of these people. If he doesn't want it then I shouldn't have to consider anything that he says because I do want it. I am attempting to get something done. This is my life. I didn't go bothering him so he has nothing to complain about. I will exit his life now. Unless he means temporarily, with the water thing, for a couple days until he surfaces again. Like I can count on that. He's a good man but we dont know the first thing about each other. And now it looks like he is irritated. He's a lot younger than I though so I am positive there are things that he just doesn't understand. Freaking out is probably not helping him understand either, its probably just freaking him out. I thought I was alone though, and I probably wouldn't have freaked out if I knew for a fact that he was here. I would have been happy to tell him and see what his reaction was.
Not to mention that these people keep setting me up to make it look like I want 2, whatever the hell that means. Im positive that that isn't helping him either especially if he is watching from afar. Hes probably totally confused.
I am totally tired and just want to take a nap. I dont know if these people have any idea that I have earplugs in and cant hear them except a slight muffle.
Im tired of being treated with no respect. After all that I have been through, you would think that I know about my own experiences in life.